Not Scared

I'm not scared of being alone

I'm scared of being lonely

I'm scared of not getting long warm hugs anymore..

I'm scared of shattering into pieces like before.

I'm scared of crying myself to sleep every damn night..

I'm scared of loosing myself to darkness even in the light.

I'm scared of the day I won't wake up and none would know..

I'm scared of myself when I'm dying inside but still put up a happy show.

I'm scared of not having someone who's scared to loose me..

I'm scared because I push people away when they pretend to choose me.

I'm scared of being fake happy so you can't know that I am broken..

I'm scared of not having someone to notice my tears when words are not spoken.

I'm scared right now more than I ever was

But I'm not really scared of being alone

Just scared of being lonely.

- Astha Goswami